At the door, everyone names a number between one and five for their energy level this morning. No follow-up questions, no explanations required. A two at the door means the household adjusts: more time, fewer demands, gentler expectations. Named states are easier to work with than unspoken ones, and the ritual makes it safe to say when the morning is hard.
How to do it
- 1"Energy check. One is exhausted, five is bouncing. What are you?"
- 2Everyone gives a number. Parent goes first.
- 3No questioning. No fixing. The number is just information.
- 4A two means fewer demands this morning. A five means move fast.
Variations
- Someone refuses to answer or says "I don't know": you go first and name an honest number, not a 5. "Three today. Slow start" — then move on without asking again.
- Use it even on great days: a five is as neutral and judgment-free as a one. The energy check is information only, not an assessment of fitness for the day.
💡 Parent tip
Give an honest number yourself — not always 4 or 5. When children hear a parent say '2 this morning', they learn that all energy states are normal and worth naming.
What your child develops
- Interoceptive vocabulary — naming an internal state on a scale builds the habit of checking in with body states
- Family attunement — a household that knows each other's energy level on a given morning functions more smoothly
- Emotional normalisation — a 1 or 2 is as valid as a 4 or 5; all states are named without judgment
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